Don’t miss Tracy Baines’ The Seaside Girls Under Fire!
There’s nothing quite like getting a pie in the face to make the audience laugh, is there?
Many moons ago, in my other life, I was company assistant stage manager for the pantomime at the Fulcrum Theatre in Slough. Charlie Drake was topping the bill in Aladdin, and my husband and his brother were appearing as the policemen.
My main duties were setting the props, one of which was filling a shopping trolley full of sweets for Charlie’s first entrance. He would stride out on stage, utter his catchphrase ‘Hello, my darlings,’ and throw them out into the audience. Kids – and adults – would leap from their seats to catch them. It’s a great way to get the audience on your side!
Another of my tasks was to fill a large dresser with custard pies for the slosh scene. Stan Simmons who was appearing as the Grand Vizier came to give me and another member of the stage crew lessons in how it was to be done.
This is how many of the old variety tricks are passed on – not written down but shown – if you’re lucky.
We had a kettle, a pile of shaving sticks, paper plates, food colouring and a piping bag.
The soap sticks were grated into a bucket and boiling water, straight from the kettle, was poured over them. We added a little food colouring – and then whisked. The manual whisk was damned hard work and soon replaced by an electric drill with whisk attachment.
Once it reached the required consistency the ‘custard’ was piled onto plates and shaped to look like cakes and trifles. Red custard filled a piping bag, and cherries and berries were added. I often thought of the people who got the pies in the face. It was soap after all and stung the eyes, but it looked fantastic, and being the right consistency stuck to their faces, dramatic and comic effect achieved as they wiped it from their eyes. Those old pros really suffered for their art, I can tell you.
A few years later I effectively ‘retired’ when I had my son. Mr B was in panto in Croydon, and I stayed at home – until I got a phone call.
‘We’re making custard pies for the slosh scene and the crew can’t get it right. Can you come down and show them how it’s done?’
How could I ignore such an emergency call.
The next day I was on the train, headed for the Ashcroft Theatre in Croydon to demonstrate the art of making proper slosh!
The panto was Dick Whittington starring Pete Murray, Nicholas Parsons and Helen Shapiro and I used it as inspiration for the panto in The Seaside Girls Under Fire. It has a ship and lots of dirty rats – what more could you ask for!
